La Nina

This three-day trip in Indonesia have been the most turbulent three days in my life. I saw this coming. Hope everything's gonna be alright. Hope I have the strength. I might not be updating for quite a while.

No, aku tak break up dengan Hakam. Takde kena mengena.

I hope it's gonna make you notice,

Being imperfect is beautiful.

You can embrace it, analyze it, be proud of it and make fun of it. You better yourself without ever forgetting what was it that you bettered it from.

It limits you from going overboard in pointing out others'.

But sometimes you just have to; you just have to point them out in others, and being really honest at that just makes you feel like you're better already.

Am I making sense?

No, I didn't think so either. It sounded right though in my head.

Can't say that I'm not excited.

Cute teaser poster, no doubt a play on the band's biggest hit Cherry Bomb.

I'm not sure whether it will do the original band justice but I can't wait to see how Kristen Stewart portrays the legend that is Joan Jett.

Comel

Low and wet

Pemalas sial nak update blog. Oh well, bukan ramai pun yang baca. Aku sebenarnya ada entry-entry berguna penuh informasi yang masih dalam bentuk draf. Tapi malas nak habiskan. So aku update gitu-gitu je lah eh. Aku nak share pendapat aku tentang beberapa perkara yang recent:

1. Cuti yang terlalu lama sangatlah memudaratkan minda. Aku dah slow bab-bab maths ni, adik aku suruh prove trigonometric identities pun aku still kena rujuk formula. Risau doh. Dah la next semester ada subject Maths yang digeruni ramai. Aku taknak repeat weh.

2. Everywhere ada babies sekarang, tension aku. Nak gigit. Nak baby jugak. Musim mengawan was 9 months ago, eh? By the way, baby Ladynoe si Sabrina tu comel. Congrats, Noe.

3. Grammy Awards punya quality agak questionable. Pada pendapat aku lah, ramai lagi eligible musicians yang layak dicalonkan seterusnya menang. Not to say Beyonce or Taylor Swift tak berbakat, cuma...ah. Susah nak explain. OK FINE aku tak suka pop/R&B. But at least Kings of Leon won.

4. Musim kahwin. Stress juga.

5. Aku rasa Sherlock Holmes bosan. Aku kagum dengan Avatar dan sanggup menjadi teman kepada sesiapa yang ingin menonton lagi. Siltsan, fkeu!

6. Oh yeah aku tengok The Time Traveler's Wife hari tu. Sedih gila babi. Both Rachel McAdams and Eric Bana are such good actors, chemistry yang electrifying. Would watch it over and over again too.

Itu saja kot. Aku dah kering idea. Bosan sangat. Kesian Hakam, aku selalu cari gaduh dengan dia.

Before I go, layan lah lagu di bawah - High and Dry - by Radiohead. I hate the way Jamie Cullum's version made it lose its intimate and personal sound. But yeah I gotta understand, Jamie's jazz.

Oh ya, any album recommendations to fill my remaining 3 weeks of holidays? Any genre.

I Peremban la macam tu.

"Pakai la brown, I used to wear brown and grey," kata aku memberi cadangan kepada pemakai-contact lens-to-be itu.

"Rambut pun nak brown lah," katanya.

"Nak jadi mat saleh celup la ni?"

"Eh my dad is Kedah campur Kedah. So Kedah."

"Okay."

"My mum is Uzbekistan campur Pakistan."

"So that makes you...?"

"Uzpakisdah."

Kenal. Eh, tak kenal langsung sebenarnya.

Susah nak kenal manusia. Kau takkan boleh kata kau kenal someone inside out. Kadangkala orang yang kau paling percaya dan paling hormat pun boleh shatter every ounce of respect you had for them. I've faced this many times in my life. Sebab itu aku selalu juga doubt orang. Tapi kena tempat lah kan. Aku takut tertipu.

Aku benci tersepit di tengah. Aku benci bila aku tiada pilihan kecuali berdiam diri. Aku benci bila aku emo macam sampah.

Sedarlah.

I'll tie a ribbon around my love for a forever of that smile.

You're such a big part of me now.

Hakam sayang, happy birthday to you.
You are my rock and my best friend.

I pray to god, that what we have, will last a lifetime.

Have a wonderful year of being 21.

(1) Day of Thinking

Bullshit dan in denial.

Kadang-kadang itulah yang aku sedar tentang cara pemikiran aku yang mempengaruhi cara hidup aku.

I hate to make this blog sound too much about me, to be too personal, too transparent*, but I don't have any other outlet where I could just be myself and talk.

Hence the occasional self-realization laced posts.

Hari ini sewaktu memandu, aku teringat blog post salah seorang kenalan yang membuat aku fikir dengan obvious dan sharp, tidak perlu dig deep : aku bukanlah bodoh untuk ignore kesilapan-kesilapan, flaw dan whatever there is wrong in my life.

Aku bukanlah tidak berakal untuk distinguish apa yang baik dan buruk.

Tetapi kadangkala aku blur-kan yang buruk dan seolah aku tampal sticker 'baik' di atasnya, untuk terus hidup in denial and hinder necessary change.

Bullshit kerana kadang-kadang aku hidup dengan too much hope yang aku tahu suatu hari nanti akan menyakitkan.

*transparent : 1. The correct answer to the 'teka-teki' "Apa nama mak/ayah Transformers?"

Paranormal Activity

Pada suatu malam, mereka berbual ringan menerusi telefon bimbit mengenai filem-filem terkini dan terdahulu yang menarik. Bedtime chat. The usual. Skrin N78 pun dah panas. Perbualan beralih kepada genre horror.

"Drag Me to Hell is listed as one of 50 Best Movies of the Decade tau!" kata si lelaki.

"Memang best pun cerita tu! Suka gila." kata si perempuan.

"Tapi tak tau la kenapa orang cakap Paranormal Activity tu best -"

"TULA! Tak best langsung! Bullshit gile la all the internet buzz pasal movie tu. Bosan nak mampus. Not scary at all. Dahla kena tunggu lame until something happens, recording dalam rumah je. Ee bosan!"

"Memang bosan gile...tak best pun."



Diam. Si perempuan toleh ke pintu bilik yang samar-samar. Kunci. Okay. Gelap. Alih ke tingkap. Bayang-bayang apa tu?



"Jom cakap pasal movie lain?"